Yup, They Made That – Page 2

Progress But Not Perfection

At this year’s VMA Awards Beyonce was determined to not be out twerked by the pretenders to the throne Minaj and Cyrus. She thrilled audiences with a spangle sparkly-pole-shimmying extravaganza featuring her greatest hits–as opposed to Solange’s greatest hits which took place in an elevator.

In the middle of it all, Beyonce decided her brand would embrace feminism, complete with a flashy animation of the word Framed by her thigh gapand a definition. If only my Powerpoints for class could be so exciting; at least they actually make sense.

She followed this lesson in feminism with a rousing rendition of “Bow down, Bitch!”while leaning on a line of women’s asses. Fantastic!

If you hate feminism, maybe this made you hate it a little less. If you love feminism, maybe you threw up. Either way, all those sparkling leotards have shined a light on redefining feminism for a new era. They also may have stopped bell hook’s heart for a few minutes.

With the angry backlash against women and men having equal rights at #whyidontneedfeminism and the very real push back against women’s reproduction and economic rights, we need more people to sign on to the struggle for gender equity, so thanks, Beyonce, for being my plus one. Now about that definition of yours….

Fire Challenge: Not Hot!

The fire challenge. There is nothing to say other than this is the dumbest shit I’ve seen in a minute.

Way Unfair

Over the summer I was sick for a bit. Laid out on the couch I faded in and out of sleep for hours. Every time I woke up, I saw this ad–every damn time: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-FHYxjcubXk This ad is catchy and terrible at the same time. The lyrics are less than musical and the nice spread of diversity does little to make it better. Dear Wayfair, knock it off.

Big Fish and Dog Licks

I’ve noticed a lot of ads for mobile games like Bubble witch, Pet Rescue Saga and Papa Pear. All three are games produced by King, the company that created the wildly addictive Candy Crush Saga.

If these games are your fave, you’re probably not the typical gamer. Kings target audience is women, particularly 20 something and up. This strategy has made King one of the hottest internet game companies. While King’s IPO didn’t thrill at a little over $20.00 a share, it’s still holding on as a multimillion dollar publicly traded company. Not bad money made off of virtual lollipops and donuts.

But with Candy Crush’s popularity waning, it should be no surprise that Big Fish games is circling like a shark. Big Fish has an ad with a particularly feminine flair–check it out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HApTE7IU-qI

Okay, is it me, or does the ad scream “I’m the perfect game for lonely dog/cat ladies doing nothing at home”? And if you are that dog/cat lady, please know that playing slots on your iPad will not result in a Sex-In The-City life . You’re going to have to put that cat on a leash and leave the house if you want to meet hot guys.

Reserved For The Homies

You know, for your gin and juice loving cook-out guests, cause it ain’t no fun if the homies can’t park, hon.

Creepy Animal Crackers

I was just minding my own business, enjoying some animal crackers when Stop and Shop hit me with this #tbt Nabisco ad taped to my crackers.

That’s one creepy kid….do you want a cracker now?…is it the Pharrell hat?

But It Didn’t End Well

With the crisis getting medical care for veterans, the controversy surrounding Bow Bergdahl and increasing instability in Iraq, it would seem that this is either the best or the worst time for some embedded glory from Nat Geo.

Pop Shots

Because its never too early use summer fun to prime kids to binge drink

Don’t Call Me Pizza

Domino’s, in its never-ending quest to gross you out, has decided to top a handful of chicken noobs with a bunch of sauce, cheese and meat a la pizza. The crispy Bacon Tomato Specialty Chicken is a trifecta of vegan nightmares, combining cheese, bacon and chicken–leave no barnyard animal behind!

At just $5.99, seems like cheap eats, but don’t forget that its also going to cost about 600 calories and 30+ grams of fat.

Still sucked in by its siren song of cheesiness? Just don’t call it a pizza. It ‘s “specialty chicken.” Its specialty? Being the next nasty entry in the hall of fast food failures.

What Lies Beneath

Men’swear fashion brand Paisley is creating a stir with this spot featuring a day in the life of a burqa-wearer–only not quite.

Beneath that burqa with all the lingering gazes it attracts is something surprising. So , before we’re quick to write it off as typical cultural misappropriation, there is this from the editors over at Ad Age:

{I}t also brings up interesting points about how people view the burqa — as a way for the women who wear it to “hide” their beauty, or a way for those of the opposite sex to do it for them. There’s also an interesting discussion to be had about gender identity and what it really means.

Okay, Ad Age, I hear you, and I watched the ad again–a good practice if you’re really trying to read any ad closely. I imagined what it was to be on both sides of the burqa. I am aware that the ad encourages us to think as life under the burqa as life in hiding–is it empowering for our business conducting burqa-wearer to be free of the objectifying male gaze or is the figure trapped in an invisible life? The scenes are scenes of power and privilege–luxury autos, high end design, model-ly looking models–but our burqa babe moves silently through these scenes, seen and unheard.

In the final scene, the body beneath the burqa is unveiled. Well, actually the burqa is unzipped down the back–an interesting nod to the hundreds of scenes of women being disrobed by their paramour. Disrobed, we are met with one final surprise–a simple code switch. Who wears burqa and why they wear it is all worth questioning. Paisley certainly isn’t shaking their fist at Muslim patriarchy, but with a little imagination, they might make you think.